I began writing things down in a journal many years ago, and it has meant so many different things to me at different points. Initially, it was about writing down things about my everyday life, but I don’t have an interesting life, so it felt very repetitive to be writing about nothing in particular. My teenage self had a lot to say, though. I wrote poems, random thoughts, scribbled and let out all my early-teenage angst into the pages of my diary. Later, it became an outlet for things that I don’t necessarily want to keep bottled up and it continues to be that for me.
I don’t really remember why I got into this habit, but I know, for a fact, that writing things down has always had a very soothing effect on me. It’s my version of yelling into the void. I wasn’t in a very great spot, last night, for reasons that will remain in my head, and I brought my journal out after quite some time. And I have to say, last night was the best and most peaceful sleep that I’ve had in a while.
There are always things that bother us and even if we do have friends who are kind enough to lend us an ear and understand what we’re going through, there are certain things we can’t really bring ourselves to talk about, no matter how much trust the other person. It feels like a terrible thing to be imposing upon the people we care about. I’m pretty sure that they’d like to believe otherwise, but there are always things that we carry without wanting to make it anybody else’s problem. In such cases, I choose to write it all down.
People have their own ways to cope with things, I guess, and they’re all very valid unless they’re causing harm to anyone at all. In case you’re feeling a little overwhelmed today, let it all out. Even if doing so just means that you’re going to sit by the seaside and throw rocks into the water. It is never healthy to keep it all to yourself, and even though letting it out is difficult and exhausting, it is very important. I can’t speak for anybody else here, but it feels like I’m suffocating inside when I keep things that bother me all to myself.
Which is how I know that it can’t be a good thing to have all those voices in your head yelling at you on surround sound all the time. The worst always seems to come out whenever we’re at our lowest and it is just too much to take. We might keep pushing ourselves to go through it, but the truth remains that we cannot expect a wardrobe bursting with clothes to not come open and unhinge at some point. Things that take a toll on you in a bad way can’t be all that good, can they?
I hope you find out what works best for you, whenever you read this.
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