“I know it sounds like you’re in a toxic relationship with something when you’ve tried to walk away from it several times, whether it was because you wanted to or because you owed it to the circumstances, and ended up walking right back on the road that you thought you didn’t want to walk. Then again, who are we to deny happiness when it walks right into our lives and does everything it can to stay right here as we try to push it away in the fear that we’d only be happy to have it all torn away from us cruelly, somehow. It’s sad to me how we think that we aren’t deserving of love or happiness. It seems to me as though we have all convinced ourselves that we’ll never find those things so we fail to notice when they seek us out, as if it’s some freak of nature. How hard it is for us to believe that there is somebody out there who could love us, as we are, for who we are and for who we want to be! I guess it’s one too many lessons learned the hard way. I assume it’s not just the case with people, it’s also the same with things that we love to do. I’ve been told that when we do something that we love professionally, we are prone to working ourselves into the ground and letting it take over our lives an unhealthy amount. So, it’s only right when we choose to walk away from it, even if it is only for a little while. It’s like taking the longest route home because you want to listen to more music. It’s like taking a bus to the seaside and sitting there, watching the waves crash over themselves, as long as we can. There is a method to this madness. We run away from the things that we love because we fear that we’ll let the love consume us like wildfire. We run away because even the warmth can get suffocating after a while. And unless you’re into something like being suffocated, it’s not exactly the best thing for anybody. Taking a walk is good for us and we should probably do it more often. But there is always the fight or flight in us that is egging us on to run away as far as our feet can take us before we somehow ‘ruin’ what good we have right now. How about we stay, for a change? It’s exactly like gravity. It keeps your feet on the ground, but that doesn’t mean you can’t fly. Nothing stays up in the air forever. Not those with wings. Not those that go with the wind. None of them. Eventually, they all come back to what’s holding them together. So, if you’re somebody who has been feeling overwhelmed by everything that you love, lately, take a walk and leave them all behind for a while. What’s keeping you going will always lead you back to what keeps you together. Eventually.”
The Shubhster Diaries 
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