The 20’s are so weird.
I’ve barely just begun and I find it the most confusing stage of life because suddenly, the road in front of has forked into so many directions, I don’t know where to go! I mean, I do know where I want to go with my life, but there are so many options; one can’t help but get tempted.
Everyone’s taking life seriously all of a sudden, and who can blame them? That’s the world we live in. Your 20’s are going to be a massive change from your teenage years in every aspect of your life, and unless you are willing to unlearn and learn, maybe a hundred or so times over, it doesn’t get easy.
Here are the things that you’ll learn about friendships in your 20’s, no matter where you are from or how many friends you have:
1. You won’t be able to relate to some of your friends anymore.
Your 20’s are where you decide whether you want to study further or start working. And this is where you and your friends will part ways because you want different things from life. Chances are that they’re now part of a different circle and so are you, and you don’t feel like there’s a whole lot in common. And nobody’s going to take it personally, either.
2. No matter how much you socialize, you’ll end up with a very tiny circle.
In your 20’s, socializing becomes a very important part of your life, whether you like it or not. There will be campus clubs, workplace meetings or retreats, and of course, parties where you’ll socialize with a lot of people. And even if you’re friends with these people, you’ll always come back to your small circle because quality always comes before quantity.
3. You’ll take ownership when you’re at fault.
This one is a welcome change when compared to friendships from your teenage years. Friendships no longer break up just because your friend ‘just doesn’t get it!‘ You begin to understand that not all fights begin because of your friend and sometimes, you are at fault as well. Friendships in your 20’s are about growth as an individual, which is a drastic change from puberty-fuelled arguments in your teenage.
4. You’ll put in a lot more work into friendships.
Because your 20’s are the time where you and your friend are going to be busy doing your own thing, education or work-wise, taking out the time for each other becomes a lot harder— which is so ironic because the only person you want to share things with, in your 20’s, are your closest friends. It’s going to suck, but you’ll eventually find a way around that.
5. There are hang-friends and then there are the talk-friends.
Friendships in your 20’s are mostly swinging between the friends you hang out with when you want a fun day out and the friends you can talk to anything about. It’s almost as if work and play don’t exist on the same plane when it comes to friendships sometimes, and nobody takes it personally. But if your hang-friend and your talk-friend are the same people, then boy have you hit the jackpot!
6. Sometimes, you’ll have to be your own best friend.
With everyone wrapped up in building their lives brick by brick, there will be times when you’ll feel like you’re falling apart and all you’ll need at that moment is a good talk with your friends. But it might not always be possible because of priorities. And no matter how much everyone says that you need to prioritize your friends, sometimes, they just can’t rush to your aid and you’ll have to toughen up and be your own friend.
I know this sounds harsh right now, but it’s just a part of life, as we’ll all come to realize. I’m still having trouble keeping up with the changes that my 20’s are throwing my way, but that’s probably because I’m still coming to terms with it. But I’ll learn, and so will we all.
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