If It Was Only.

It was the first drop of rain,
But I felt it in the air,
I felt everything around me change,
All that I thought was for the better
Took a tragic turn
And the sun never seemed to shine again;
The days went dark
And the candles blown out,
The air went cold and quiet—
Before the first rains hit us,
The heartache broke us,
Nothing left here for us to try.

It was only a silent night,
The moon not quite full yet,
But the earliest clouds shone so bright—
I wrote a song for you just days before,
One you’ll never set your eyes on,
You only left a word saying you’ll be gone.
Maybe things never meant to you
The way they did to me,
And I can only hope that someday you can see;
Though you remain so long gone,
I find myself writing these songs
Hoping they could keep me company.

It was only the last thing
That you ever said to me
And with all my soul, I believed,
I see how it’s all so true,
The only ones with the knife
Are the ones who meant anything to you–
Stabbed me where it hurts the most,
Drew blood like it was your intention,
A trap you lured me into all along;
I wonder if it ever haunts you,
In the middle of a silent night,
I wonder what peace my wounds did ever buy.

If it was only meant to end well,
Maybe our paths did part their ways,
Not a glance you spared as I watched you walk away;
Who knew this would be the end?
We had so many stories to tell,
And now we never will,
But some things are better left buried,
Deep in an unmarked grave,
Along with memories of all that they ever gave;
How I wish that could be enough!
How I wish that it could be true,
All along I wondered if it was only you.

~© Shubhangi Srinivasan.


Happy World Poetry Day, everyone! Poetry has been a huge part of healing for me in the last few months and it has really helped me in more ways than I can count. I have written more poems here than I was ever comfortable with writing and it means a lot to me that people actually read and appreciate what I write here. I hope you enjoy reading this poem, today, and feel free to leave links of your favourite poems in the comments, too!
Yours truly,
The Shubhster. Xx


Featured Image by Damien DUFOUR Photographie on Unsplash

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