I spent the entirety of today reading.
It feels so good! I haven’t done this in years now. I haven’t experienced the joy that reading brings in a really long time. I didn’t have the attention span for it, honestly. But today, I somehow got myself to read because I was actually interested and because I actually had the kind of free time on my hands to indulge myself in some extensive reading. I didn’t watch anything on TV like I usually would have. I didn’t feel like painting. I didn’t feel like writing today, either, honestly. It has just been a really boring day, saved by the rains and by the book I’ve been reading. I’ll probably go back and read some more before I finally call it a day.
I’ve been waiting on some news regarding a job, now that the writing trial is over, and I’ve also been waiting on some news about something really important that I’ve been working on for a while now. It has all just kept me so antsy in the past month, I haven’t really given myself the time to focus on anything other than my projects and deadlines. And now that I finally have some free time, especially time that I’ve earned after a lot of hard work, I really just want to kick back and let myself laze around for a while instead of doing something productive instead.
It baffles me just how much of our time we think we’re wasting if we’re not doing something productive with it. It is a little sad to think that we have to guilt ourselves into being productive instead of actually letting ourselves unwind. There is just so much that is going through our brains at any given moment in time, and I wouldn’t really be surprised if we all came out a little exhausted by the end of all that. I just wish we gave ourselves some time to heal and unwind instead of pushing ourselves to the limit.
Listen to what you want. It’s okay to unwind and not be productive for a day. Your pile of work is still going to be where you left it, and trust me when I say that you’re not going to get much done with a cluttered head.
Give yourself time. Xx