Dear (In)Dependent person,
This is a letter to remind you that it is completely okay to want to be emotionally dependent on someone at times, even though you’re a pretty independent person in general. You have your entire life figured out in front of you, and you have breakdowns sometimes. That’s okay, though, because we all do, and it is absolutely nothing to be ashamed of. Embrace it!❤️
We can totally relate with the way you feel at times. This is what many independent people face, to be honest. You are a very strong individual, you have found your place in this big, bad world and yet, you feel like you need a shoulder to lean on when the times are rough. We get it, and no, we won’t judge your individuality because let’s face it- all of us have our emotional highs and lows.
You, dear (In)Dependent friend, are like a tender coconut- tough on the outside, but equally soft and cool on the inside. You’re tough to the world outside, you don’t let anybody in, you have an aura of strength about you. But you also wish to lie down on the couch, watch rom-coms and eat ice-cream, with a box of tissues on your side; and no one knows about this part of you because you’re usually the most independent person they’ve ever come across. And at times, you wish that you could curl up beside your best friend, or your lover, or your parents- whoever provides you the maximum emotional support, and just cry your heart out to them. And that is perfectly fine, too.
People around you have immense respect for you. They wish they could be like you; they love the strong, independent, decisive, determined person that you are! But they haven’t come across the softer, gentler side of you; a side that they’d love even more, we dare say. What we would love for you to show is that softer side of you. Because, sometimes, we do think that you have your life sorted (and we mean that in the sweetest way possible!) and that you keep troubles at bay.
We tend to forget that you’re just another person like the rest of us, too; and you are just as emotionally vulnerable as we are. While you are better at hiding them, we are not. So, we’d like you to let us in once in awhile and confide in us. You’d never guess who’s having a worse day than you are (or hey, they could be in a similar situation and you can help them out- you know, you being the smart, decisive one?). You’ll be able to live more freely if you don’t try to stop people from entering your emotional barriers, so much. That will also save you all the effort and emotional exhaustion.
And while you think that being emotionally dependent is a bad thing, we’re here to remind you that anything in excess is bad, and anything in moderation is good; and we all know that there’s a little good in everything bad and a little bad in everything that’s good. That is life, we cannot control everything that comes our way. Sometimes, things get as screwed-up as they can possibly get. But eventually, even they will get better. So it’s not always bad to be emotionally dependent- we can cheat a little (just like cheating our diet charts and eating a big tub of ice-cream!)
The most proudly independent man depends on those around him for their insensible influence on his character – his life.
― Elizabeth Gaskell,
And hey, always, ALWAYS, tell someone when you’re feeling low. Yes, you’re independent and you don’t need anyone. But when we tell you that sharing your problems will make you feel better about them, we’re not kidding. And who knows? Maybe in the process of sharing your problems with your friends (or anyone else, really!), you’d work out a solution to it. Doesn’t that sound amazing? It’s like you just swish your wand and ta-da! (No, really! There’s a huge possibility that it might happen!)
So, the next time you feel like you need someone to lean on, remember that you’re not really being emotionally dependent; you’re just an independent person who needs some emotional support at the moment. Don’t beat yourself up thinking that you’re turning emotionally dependent- you’re not.
The Shubhster, and the people who want you to know that being emotionally dependent at times is okay.
Hey guys! Comment below and let me know what you think! Also, share if you know of an independent person who doesn’t want to let anyone in because they think that it’s being emotionally dependent. Give them a hug, tell them that it’s perfectly fine to want some kind of a support in their lows. Spread love and pixie-dust!