#NaPoWriMo Day 29: The Mind of an Artist.

I keep telling myself that I won’t hate
The art that took me hours to make,
And yet, somehow, somewhere along the way,
I tell myself, “Perhaps, I’m not good enough.”
And of course, I am not,
Don’t I already know?
There will always be another
Who is so much better, so,
Does this mean I should give up trying?
I’ve only taken but a single step;
Miles and miles to go there shall always be,
So, maybe I should keep trying, instead.

With every swirling colour,
And every other brush stroke,
Could my canvas paint a picture
That in my mind, I so behold?
Would every little detail be preserved too?
From the way the water catches light,
To how, in the wind, the trees might sway;
And should I fail to bring my vision to life,
Should I start over or keep working anyway?

Hours and hours of losing myself,
For a few moments of pure joy,
Eyes tracing the delicate dreamscape
That slowly, in front of me, takes shape–
Letting out a breath I didn’t know I held,
I compare the picture that’s in my head
To the one that proudly stands before me,
And tears sting the back of my eyes
As I silently admire what I see.

How rare it is for an artist,
To fall in love with her own creation!
For all we ever do is criticize,
Overthink and over-analyze,
Until all we can ever see are flaws–
But for now, I’ll smile at my art,
And give myself a silent round of applause.

~© Shubhangi Srinivasan.

Deviating from today’s original prompt via napowrimo.net, I chose to write about my art and the things that go through my mind every single time I create a piece of art. To quote my best friend here, I ‘nurtured and developed them with my hands and that says a lot’. Xx


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