Reconnecting.

If you’ve been following my blog for the last few weeks, you probably also know that I haven’t exactly been going through the best time. And it has reflected badly in my art because my art has always been an extension of myself. The better I’m feeling, the higher my spirits are, the better my art will be. Whether it’s writing, sketching or painting. For most people, art springs from a place of pain, but that has never been the case for me. Which is why, when I take a break from art, it takes me some time to get back to it.

I’m saying this because a while back, I started learning how to make digital art. My first attempt at it was somewhat decent. But for some reason, I couldn’t get back to it the next day. Or the day after that. I tried to look at things that would inspire me, I tried to sit in front of my sketchbook so I could visualize and let my thoughts out in the form of art. But I couldn’t, and I wasn’t really surprised when that happened because recovery can often be a slow process and that is okay.

“Vanilla rays on inky midnight skies.🖤✨

(Tried my hand at digital art for the first time. I guess I did okay😁.) pic.twitter.com/Rqk49PPVY6

— Shubhangi Srinivasan (@_The_Shubhster_) December 8, 2019 

And today, when I got back to it after a long, long time, I definitely did not do a good job of it because I hadn’t been in touch with my art for a while. And it only made me feel a lot more dejected because I thought I had given my everything to that one attempt that I made months ago. But then I had to remind myself that the art is inside me. And right now, it’s probably just somewhere deep within where I can’t connect with it. But that doesn’t mean I can’t ever create something as good as I used to ever again.

Blanket of Dreams.🖤✨

(Not my best, but I’m trying to get back to this after a LONG time away.) pic.twitter.com/84ONhqCwnt

— Shubhangi Srinivasan (@_The_Shubhster_) January 4, 2020 

We all go through a point where things that we love doing just don’t feel appealing anymore. The music you’d usually dance to suddenly annoys you, too much energy exhausts you even if you’re not the energetic one in the equation, your patience wears thin and you’re constantly just done with everything. And often, it feels like the end of the world because when we distance ourselves from everything we love, there is very little point to our existence. But all of this could just be a sign that we’ve been tapped out and that we need to reconnect with ourselves.

There’s no exact duration to this, either. You might take a few days to feel better before you can get back to doing the things you love. Sometimes, it can take longer than that. But don’t let it make you feel as if you’re drifting away from your passion because that isn’t what this is. You’re probably just going through something that you need to deal with first. Your passion isn’t something that you can smother out. Believe me, I’ve tried to convince myself that this isn’t what I wanted, but guess what? It’s exactly where I need to be.

If you’re going through such a time, where you feel like you’re unable to connect with your passion, remember that it is important to be kind to yourself. Forcing yourself to create isn’t going to help at all because all of us have that one thing that drives us to create. It has to be spontaneous. And when you feel like it’s the right time to get back to doing what you love, go for it. But also remember to be patient with yourself. Your passion is a part of you, and it will manifest when the time is right, and not a second sooner.

Remember that this is something that everybody goes through. Too much of anything can be bad. No matter how much you love it. You’re not ‘broken’; don’t listen to anybody who tells you that, even if that somebody is you. You’re not lost. You’re just exhausted and tapped out. And trust me. It happens to the best of us. You’re going to be okay, even if it isn’t right away.

Cheerio! Xx

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Yours truly,
The Shubhster.

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Featured Image by Teodor Petkov on Unsplash