I spent the entire evening wondering why things never seem to go my way even though I’ve put in so much hard work into them; it always feels like the harder you work, the worse it’s going to fail in ways you couldn’t even comprehend.
I’ve spent months working on a project that is very important to me, and now that we’re in the final stages of the process, things seem to keep getting messed up. No matter how many times I try to clarify that the presentation doesn’t look the way I want it to, the team I’ve been working with remains adamant and keeps ignoring the changes I’ve suggested even though the project is under my name. This is really heartbreaking to me because this was supposed to be a step towards something I truly love, but from where I stand right now, I don’t even know when this project will come to life.
I spent a lot of time wondering why things are going so wrong and where they’re going wrong, because I’ve gone over my part of the work a couple hundred times at the most, and it still feels like it’s not enough because the draft keeps getting messed up.
This is where I realized that the problem here really isn’t me. It’s really not something I need to fix, this time. It’s them.
We all have this tendency to beat ourselves up for things that we have little to no control over. But we need to understand that it isn’t always our fault. And by that, I mean, try not to blame yourselves too much all the time because there are always a lot of other factors in play. Think of it as a group project where you’ve done your best but the others haven’t. There’s not much you can do except help them do better.
Otherwise, your work there is done, and there is very little, if nothing, that you can be blamed for.
The way I look at it, sometimes, people find it very difficult to keep up their pace to match ours and it all ends in situations where we find ourselves falling behind. Remember that it is not always you.
Give yourself some credit for all the work that you’ve been putting in so far. Remind yourself that you are good enough and that your capabilities will always shine through, no matter how much you feel like you’re lagging right now. Besides, there is a lot that could be out of your control and you don’t even know what that could be.
You don’t control where the wind blows. You only control which way you want to be facing when the wind blows.
Cut yourself some slack and acknowledge the work you’ve been putting in so far. Xx