Ideally, the answer would be, well, never. But we don’t really live in an ideal world now, do we? Sometimes, friendships go sour and it’s time to walk away from them before the bond becomes toxic and begins affecting anybody’s emotional health.
This is the kind of loss that doesn’t come from a death or a tragedy but still hurts like a heartbreak because we all know that friendships are just as strong as any other kind of relationship. And sometimes, things are just beyond the point of fixing so the only thing we can do is to graciously accept the end of a friendship and let go.
I bet this seems weird coming from me because I always encourage everybody to maintain friendships and to try and be understanding enough. But today I realized that sometimes, it’s just better to let go of certain friendships because there is such a thing as being ‘beyond repair‘.
There are two types of friendships that we’ll form in life. The kind that will stay the same no matter how long you have gone without communication— the true kind, and the kind that will fade away over time and eventually go sour for reasons you cannot begin to explain anymore because it feels like a chore.
I’ve had to come to terms with the fact that I need to let go of someone because their presence in my life had turned toxic, more than just a couple of times. I’m not going to call them out here for obvious reasons. Although I’ve never felt the need to explain my actions to anybody till date, today I decided to let you all know that it is okay if you choose to let go of a friendship when it gets toxic.
And how do you know when it gets toxic? When every conversation somehow leads to an ugly argument and when you can no longer just stand by and watch them disregard your friendship as though it meant nothing, you know that things have gone really, really bad to the point of no return. It’s when you feel suffocated and annoyed in their company because they make it a point to restart the same old drama instead of moving past it.
When you see a pattern forming and when you are conscious that this pattern is affecting the way you feel about your friend, I’m afraid it’s time to let go of the friendship. This isn’t the time for you to try being the bigger person and apologizing irrespective of whether it was your fault. It’s about how long this has been going on.
But no matter what you choose to do, don’t walk away from a friendship without giving the other person an explanation, unless it is absolutely unnecessary. If you feel as though your spirits are being dampened simply by being in their presence because of all the excessive negativity, it’s time that you let go of the friendship.
It’s a really hard thing to do, and I understand if you take the time to see how this is affecting your growth emotionally. But I really hope that all of you have the courage to break out of toxic friendships someday.
Warm hugs and Cheerio! Xx
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