Ever since I made a few changes to the way I look at myself, I’ve had people come up to me and say that something has changed about me and they can’t quite put a finger on it; all they know that I ‘glow differently‘ now. I don’t know what they’re talking about, but I’ve noticed a change in a lot of people who have started embracing themselves more, too.
Maybe it’s in the way I stopped feeling too conscious about the way I looked, so when I smile now, it’s not an insecure smile, it’s a genuine one. I truly believe that when you start loving yourself more, you will notice a lot of positive changes in yourself. And it’s worth every bit of the struggle it takes to embrace yourself.
Here are some ways you will change when you start loving yourself:
1. Relationships are immediately much healthier.
Remember how in his book ‘The Perks of Being a Wallflower‘, Stephen Chbosky wrote that “We accept the love we think we deserve”? It’s simple logic: when you start loving yourself more, you also tell yourself that you are worthy of love.
You no longer have the tolerance or the time for toxic people in your life. Suddenly, you find yourself calling people out when they try to make you feel bad for simply being yourself because there’s no way you’re going to tolerate that kind of negativity anymore.
2. You are so much more comfortable in your own skin.
You are who you are. Once you accept yourself for the way you look or something that made you really insecure in the past, you start letting go of whatever inhibitions held you back from being 100% yourself to the outside world.
When you start loving yourself, you’ll see those ‘flaws’ that made you so insecure every time you’d look into the mirror fade away slowly, until they’re no longer flaws you want to hide. You accept them as a part of who you really are.
3. You become confident.
Once you’re comfortable in your skin and have stopped worrying about what the rest of the world is going to think of you, you own everything about yourself. It shows in the way you walk, the way you talk, and even in your choice of outfit.
Now that there’s nothing left for you to be shy about, you’ll speak up more often when you want to make yourself heard, which can lead to seizing a lot of great opportunities. Who knows? You might just have this whole life thing sorted out.
4. Your wardrobe gets a major upgrade.
When I started to feel a little better about the way I look, I went from wearing jeans and oversized, full-sleeved tees to wearing dresses. I realized that there was no reason why I should deny myself things that I secretly wanted for so long.
Once you start loving yourself, you start paying attention to things that will bring out your best features. You’ll have a clear idea of what your style aesthetic is, and it will reflect on the way you present yourself on the outside.
5. You become more driven and motivated.
When you realize how much potential you have, you start to focus on honing those skills. Loving yourself will also make you believe in yourself a lot more than you did before. You’ll chase your goals with a passion you didn’t know before because you just know that you can do it.
You know exactly what you want and you aren’t afraid to go after it anymore. It is the best feeling ever because you know that you deserve so much more, and you also know that you won’t stop the hustle until you get to where you want to.
6. Failures don’t crush you like they did before.
There is something about loving yourself that makes you accept that you aren’t superhuman. You are human, and there is a certain amount of grace in that. You know that you’ll always get another shot at your goal, even if it takes you some more time.
You aren’t too hard on yourself about your failures because you know that even with everything in your power, there are obstacles. I’m not saying that failures will never hurt you because they always do. But you’ll have the strength to get up and throw yourself into doing everything to achieve your goals.
7. You don’t care about what people have to say anymore.
The kind of freedom that comes with loving yourself is simply out of this world. There is no constant need to put on a mask in front of the world because you’re scared they won’t like who you really are. You love yourself, and that’s the end of discussion.
You develop the ability to ignore silly taunts and comments because they don’t bother you anymore. Your head doesn’t ring with the mean things people say about you or have said about you in the past, simply because your love for yourself trumps all the hate.
In a nutshell, loving yourself will make you so much happier. I know, it’s not an easy thing to do. A lot of people that I know struggle with accepting themselves, even though they’re amazing human beings. And I just want to let them know that it’s okay. Self-love is one of the hardest things to do, and if you can’t do that for yourself today, you will someday.
Until then, just know that I’m here if you ever want to talk about it sometime.
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Featured image by Bart LaRue on Unsplash